A brother offended is harder to win than a strong city,
And contentions are like the bars of a castle.—Proverbs 18:19
If you are reading this and you are in the middle of an estranged relationship with either a brother or sister in Christ or a family member then you can truly understand the writer’s inspired words here.
Romans 2 tells us that it is the goodness of God that leads us to repentance. Romans 12 says that as much as depends on us we are to live peaceably with one another. It also reminds us to not think of ourselves more highly than we ought to think. We are to consider the other person’s needs as more important than our own. We are to bring unity through humility.
Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself. Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others.—Philippians 2:3-4
Proverbs tells us that
The beginning of strife is like releasing water;
Therefore stop contention before a quarrel starts.—Proverbs 17:14
Great advice, but there are times, when despite your best efforts, contention wins the day. Sometimes the other party does not want to be won.
Woe is me, that I dwell in Meshech,
That I dwell among the tents of Kedar!
My soul has dwelt too long
With one who hates peace.
I am for peace;
But when I speak, they are for war.—Psalm 120:5-7
He has put forth his hands against those who were at peace with him;
He has broken his covenant.
The words of his mouth were smoother than butter,
But war was in his heart;
His words were softer than oil,
Yet they were drawn swords.—Psalm 55:20
So what do we, as the one who desires peace? The answer is found in the next verse of Psalm 55 above.
Cast your burden on the LORD,
And He shall sustain you;
He shall never permit the righteous to be moved.—Psalm 55:21
Don’t give up. Pray! Join forces with the One who can break the bars of iron. The One who can make the crooked places straight and the fortified walls fall down before us.
Without Him we can do nothing good. The weapons of our warfare are not carnal but mighty in God for bringing down strongholds. Our Father in Heaven, whose desire is for all of us to put on love which is the bond of perfection, will help us. He can and will give us the grace to keep our hearts from bitterness and help us to forgive the ones we love for each and every long day of separation we endure. He will also give us the grace to sustain us through all the emotional turmoil, hurt and betrayal that comes with rejection.
Beloved…No one understands rejection and betrayal like our Lord and our Savior, Jesus Christ. ❤️
He is despised and rejected by men,
A Man of sorrows and acquainted with grief.
And we hid, as it were, our faces from Him;
He was despised, and we did not esteem Him.—Isaiah 53:3
Seeing then that we have a great High Priest who has passed through the heavens, Jesus the Son of God, let us hold fast our confession. For we do not have a High Priest who cannot sympathize with our weaknesses, but was in all points tempted as we are, yet without sin. Let us therefore come boldly to the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy and find grace to help in time of need.—Hebrews 4:14-16
For consider Him who endured such hostility from sinners against Himself, lest you become weary and discouraged in your souls. You have not yet resisted to bloodshed, striving against sin.—Hebrews 12:4
