Search me, O God, and know my heart; Try me, and know my anxieties; And see if there is any wicked way in me, And lead me in the way everlasting.—Psalm 139:23-24
As a younger Christian I literally winced when I prayed this kind of searching prayer. My heart really didn’t want to know. I was afraid of the increased trials that might come my way in order to refine and purify my heart. There were also probably things in my life that maybe I wasn’t quite ready to give up or to put under His scrutinizing eye. I am now a pretty much a search and scrutinize away kinda person. Lord...show me my sin...I WANT to know when I am in the wrong and not walking according to Your commandments. My heart takes comfort in knowing my God sees me...all of me. The good, the bad and the ugly. I am greatly comforted that He knows every one of my thoughts...that He watches over me and is ALWAYS with me. I am me, and I often don’t understand me! I am so grateful that HE does. He knows the way I take. He leads me. His plans for me are good. I want to walk in the right way. I don’t want to have to go the long way around. I want to go in the “way everlasting”...the way that is pleasing to God and profitable for me. The way that ends in awaking in His likeness and living in His Presence forever.
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