Letter to My Mom from 2005

Missing my mom this Mother's Day...The eternal God is your refuge and underneath are His everlasting arms. 

March 11, 2005

Dear Mom,

It is hard for me to believe that you're going to be eighty...I don't even want to think about it, Mom.  I just want to tell you how much I love you and that your presence in my life is such a blessing.  What a gift the Lord gave me when he gave me you.  There really aren't words...your example to me over the years has been an inspiration and has led me down many right paths.  

As I get older I understand more and more the impact that parents have on their childrens' lives.  Thank you from the bottom of my heart for all you have taught me and are still teaching me.  My life is a reflection of the Lord and His faithfulness but you, Mom,  taught me about HIM.

"You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, when you walk by the way, when you lie down, and when you rise up.--Deuteronomy 6:7

Thank you for your steadfastness and faithfulness over the years...even when I sorely disappointed you.  What a blessing that the Lord included this verse in Romans...

And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose.--Romans 8:28

Most of all Mom thank you for teaching me how to be a mother...How to love my children...Each one of my girls is such a blessing from God and a wonderful tribute to all that you taught me.  Mom, I receive so many compliments on my girls...the glory truly goes to the Lord and to you for showing me how.

My life is a reflection of the values that both you and Dad instilled in me at a young age...thank you for your love, compassion, discipline...and, of course, all the hard work. (Smile)

Her children rise up and call her blessed;
Her husband also, and he praises her:--Proverbs 31:28

Dad...I don't want you to feel left out...your steadfastness, strength, kindness and protection enabled me to have the stability necessary to raise my girls and to choose a man who shares the same values.  I love you, Dad. 

Psalm 127

Unless the Lord builds the house,
They labor in vain who build it;
Unless the Lord guards the city,
The watchman stays awake in vain.
 It is vain for you to rise up early,
To sit up late,
To eat the bread of sorrows;
For so He gives His beloved sleep.

Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord,
The fruit of the womb is a reward.
 Like arrows in the hand of a warrior,
So are the children of one’s youth.
Happy is the man who has his quiver full of them;
They shall not be ashamed,
But shall speak with their enemies in the gate.

“The Lord bless you and keep you;
 The Lord make His face shine upon you,
And be gracious to you;
The Lord lift up His countenance upon you,
And give you peace.”’--Numbers 6:24-26

from my journal:

I miss you Mom and am grateful for my conversation with you last Mother's Day...Here is what I wrote in my journal about it that day: 

"Woke my mom up on Mother's Day and of course she LOVED it. As I spoke to her I was thinking that it might be the last time I could wish her a Happy Mother's Day on this earth...which made me choke up during my prayer for her but by God's grace I made it through. Just before I got off the phone she told me how much she loved me and how good I had been to her and to Daddy. What a blessing from the Lord for both her and me to have been given a small window of clarity and coherence at 7:45 this morning. God is good."

This is the journal entry I made after seeing my mom for the last time this past November...

"Spent some time with my mom today who, from what we are told, is very near the end of her life this side of heaven. The one word that I would use to describe her demeanor would be GRACIOUS. She was in death as I remember her in life....forever and always gracious to everyone AND when I grow up I want to be just like her."

Love is the Antidote for Sin...

Let all that you do be done with love.--1 Corinthians 16:14

Jesus said to him, “‘You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind.’  This is the first and great commandment. ³⁹ And the second is like it: ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’  On these two commandments hang all the Law and the Prophets.”--Matthew 22:37-40

God's love is the antidote for sin.  May I by Your Spirit, Father, owe no one anything but love.  He who loves another has fulfilled the law.  Your Word tells me that the commandments can be summed up in this saying, namely, 

"You shall love your neighbor as yourself."  

Love does no harm to a neighbor...love is the fulfillment of the law.  Loving others with Your love is what brings You glory and others good.  This is also what is best and good for me!  May Your love be the motivating force...may it be the reason and the power behind all that I do, think and say.   If your love is not what drives me and fills me, then no matter what I do it is vain, empty and profits me nothing.  

Your love obeys...Your love is humble....Your love is sacrificial and meets another at their point of need.  The Bible in John 13:1 tells me this:

Now before the Feast of the Passover, when Jesus knew that His hour had come that He should depart from this world to the Father, having loved His own who were in the world, He loved them to the end.  (emphasis mine)

John MacArthur says "He loved them to the end" means literally, He loved them to perfection...fervently...to the limits of love.  Oh Father, my love falls so very far short of the standards that you have not only laid out for me but also modeled for me!  This is how I want to love those you have placed in my life...to perfection!  Help me to love as You do.  Your love is NOT of me...Love is OF You.  We love, because You first loved us.  My love cannot love my enemies and do good to those who spitefully use me.  My love cannot love those who say all kinds of evil against me.  My love can only love me...my love is selfish and always seeks its own.  Your love is sacrificial...it is good and gracious to all!  You send rain on the evil and the good.  Your love was demonstrated toward me when I was still Your enemy.  When I was helpless, hopeless and against You, You died for me!  I cannot generate this kind of love on my own...it is a gift from You.  Your love sacrificed Your Son and made a way in the darkness for me.  Your love endured the cross and paid the price for my redemption.  

I surrender to You, Father and I invite Your Spirit to take control,  govern my heart and produce the fruits of righteousness to Your praise and glory!  Ministry apart from Your Spirit is empty, vain and meaningless.  Guard and clothe all my words, thoughts and actions with Your love.  Your goodness...Your active love toward me is what led me to repentance.  Help me to demonstrate that kind of love to those You place in my life.  

Let all I do be done in love!!

Cause You Really Can't Take It With You...

Three of the best Psalms to read to renew your mind and aright your thinking as wickedness seems to increase all around you.

Psalm 37 - Why do the ungodly prosper while the godly painfully struggle through life?

Psalm 49 deals with the most real and certain thing about life—DEATH....cause you really can’t take it with you. 

Psalm 73 This psalm shows us what happens when we focus on the people and the evil surrounding us...instead of the sovereign, holy God above.    (We become and envious and filled with self pity) 

The Heritage of the Righteous and the Calamity of the Wicked

A Psalm of David.

Psalm 37

1 Do not fret because of evildoers,

​​Nor be envious of the workers of iniquity.

2 ​​For they shall soon be cut down like the grass,

​​And wither as the green herb.

​

3 ​​Trust in the LORD, and do good;

​​Dwell in the land, and feed on His faithfulness.

4 ​​Delight yourself also in the LORD,

​​And He shall give you the desires of your heart.

​

5 ​​Commit your way to the LORD,

​​Trust also in Him,

​​And He shall bring it to pass.

6 ​​He shall bring forth your righteousness as the light,

​​And your justice as the noonday.

​

7 ​​Rest in the LORD, and wait patiently for Him;

​​Do not fret because of him who prospers in his way,

​​Because of the man who brings wicked schemes to pass.

8 ​​Cease from anger, and forsake wrath;

​​Do not fret—it only causes harm.

​

9 ​​For evildoers shall be cut off;

​​But those who wait on the LORD,

​​They shall inherit the earth.

10 ​​For yet a little while and the wicked shall be no more;

​​Indeed, you will look carefully for his place,

​​But it shall be no more.

11 ​​But the meek shall inherit the earth,

​​And shall delight themselves in the abundance of peace.

​

12 ​​The wicked plots against the just,

​​And gnashes at him with his teeth.

13 ​​The Lord laughs at him,

​​For He sees that his day is coming.

14 ​​The wicked have drawn the sword

​​And have bent their bow,

​​To cast down the poor and needy,

​​To slay those who are of upright conduct.

15 ​​Their sword shall enter their own heart,

​​And their bows shall be broken.

​

16 ​​A little that a righteous man has

​​Is better than the riches of many wicked.

17 ​​For the arms of the wicked shall be broken,

​​But the LORD upholds the righteous.

​

18 ​​The LORD knows the days of the upright,

​​And their inheritance shall be forever.

19 ​​They shall not be ashamed in the evil time,

​​And in the days of famine they shall be satisfied.

20 ​​But the wicked shall perish;

​​And the enemies of the LORD,

​​Like the splendor of the meadows, shall vanish.

​​Into smoke they shall vanish away.

​

21 ​​The wicked borrows and does not repay,

​​But the righteous shows mercy and gives.

22 ​​For those blessed by Him shall inherit the earth,

​​But those cursed by Him shall be cut off.

​

23 ​​The steps of a good man are ordered by the LORD,

​​And He delights in his way.

24 ​​Though he fall, he shall not be utterly cast down;

​​For the LORD upholds him with His hand.

​

25 ​​I have been young, and now am old;

​​Yet I have not seen the righteous forsaken,

​​Nor his descendants begging bread.

26 ​​He is ever merciful, and lends;

​​And his descendants are blessed.

​

27 ​​Depart from evil, and do good;

​​And dwell forevermore.

28 ​​For the LORD loves justice,

​​And does not forsake His saints;

​​They are preserved forever,

​​But the descendants of the wicked shall be cut off.

29 ​​The righteous shall inherit the land,

​​And dwell in it forever.

​

30 ​​The mouth of the righteous speaks wisdom,

​​And his tongue talks of justice.

31 ​​The law of his God is in his heart;

​​None of his steps shall slide.

​

32 ​​The wicked watches the righteous,

​​And seeks to slay him.

33 ​​The LORD will not leave him in his hand,

​​Nor condemn him when he is judged.

​

34 ​​Wait on the LORD,

​​And keep His way,

​​And He shall exalt you to inherit the land;

​​When the wicked are cut off, you shall see it.

35 ​​I have seen the wicked in great power,

​​And spreading himself like a native green tree.

36 ​​Yet he passed away, [fn1] and behold, he was no more;

​​Indeed I sought him, but he could not be found.

​

37 ​​Mark the blameless man, and observe the upright;

​​For the future of that man is peace.

38 ​​But the transgressors shall be destroyed together;

​​The future of the wicked shall be cut off.

​

39 ​​But the salvation of the righteous is from the LORD;

​​He is their strength in the time of trouble.

40 ​​And the LORD shall help them and deliver them;

​​He shall deliver them from the wicked,

​​And save them,

​​Because they trust in Him.

The Confidence of the Foolish

To the Chief Musician. A Psalm of the sons of Korah.

Psalm 49

1 Hear this, all peoples;

​​Give ear, all inhabitants of the world,

2 ​​Both low and high,

​​Rich and poor together.

3 ​​My mouth shall speak wisdom,

​​And the meditation of my heart shall give understanding.

4 ​​I will incline my ear to a proverb;

​​I will disclose my dark saying on the harp.

​

5 ​​Why should I fear in the days of evil,

​​When the iniquity at my heels surrounds me?

6 ​​Those who trust in their wealth

​​And boast in the multitude of their riches,

7 ​​None of them can by any means redeem his brother,

​​Nor give to God a ransom for him—

8 ​​For the redemption of their souls is costly,

​​And it shall cease forever—

9 ​​That he should continue to live eternally,

​​And not see the Pit.

​

10 ​​For he sees wise men die;

​​Likewise the fool and the senseless person perish,

​​And leave their wealth to others.

11 ​​Their inner thought is that their houses will last forever, [fn1]

​​Their dwelling places to all generations;

​​They call their lands after their own names.

12 ​​Nevertheless man, though in honor, does not remain; [fn2]

​​He is like the beasts that perish.

​

13 ​​This is the way of those who are foolish,

​​And of their posterity who approve their sayings.Selah

14 ​​Like sheep they are laid in the grave;

​​Death shall feed on them;

​​The upright shall have dominion over them in the morning;

​​And their beauty shall be consumed in the grave, far from their dwelling.

15 ​​But God will redeem my soul from the power of the grave,

​​For He shall receive me.Selah

​

16 ​​Do not be afraid when one becomes rich,

​​When the glory of his house is increased;

17 ​​For when he dies he shall carry nothing away;

​​His glory shall not descend after him.

18 ​​Though while he lives he blesses himself

​​(For men will praise you when you do well for yourself),

19 ​​He shall go to the generation of his fathers;

​​They shall never see light.

20 ​​A man who is in honor, yet does not understand,

​​Is like the beasts that perish.

The Tragedy of the Wicked, and the Blessedness of Trust in God

A Psalm of Asaph.

Psalm 73

1 Truly God is good to Israel,

​​To such as are pure in heart.

2 ​​But as for me, my feet had almost stumbled;

​​My steps had nearly slipped.

3 ​​For I was envious of the boastful,

​​When I saw the prosperity of the wicked.

​

4 ​​For there are no pangs in their death,

​​But their strength is firm.

5 ​​They are not in trouble as other men,

​​Nor are they plagued like other men.

6 ​​Therefore pride serves as their necklace;

​​Violence covers them like a garment.

7 ​​Their eyes bulge [fn1] with abundance;

​​They have more than heart could wish.

8 ​​They scoff and speak wickedly concerning oppression;

​​They speak loftily.

9 ​​They set their mouth against the heavens,

​​And their tongue walks through the earth.

​

10 ​​Therefore his people return here,

​​And waters of a full cup are drained by them.

11 ​​And they say, “How does God know?

​​And is there knowledge in the Most High?”

12 ​​Behold, these are the ungodly,

​​Who are always at ease;

​​They increase in riches.

13 ​​Surely I have cleansed my heart in vain,

​​And washed my hands in innocence.

14 ​​For all day long I have been plagued,

​​And chastened every morning.

​

15 ​​If I had said, “I will speak thus,”

​​Behold, I would have been untrue to the generation of Your children.

16 ​​When I thought how to understand this,

​​It was too painful for me—

17 ​​Until I went into the sanctuary of God;

​​Then I understood their end.

​

18 ​​Surely You set them in slippery places;

​​You cast them down to destruction.

19 ​​Oh, how they are brought to desolation, as in a moment!

​​They are utterly consumed with terrors.

20 ​​As a dream when one awakes,

​​So, Lord, when You awake,

​​You shall despise their image.

​

21 ​​Thus my heart was grieved,

​​And I was vexed in my mind.

22 ​​I was so foolish and ignorant;

​​I was like a beast before You.

23 ​​Nevertheless I am continually with You;

​​You hold me by my right hand.

24 ​​You will guide me with Your counsel,

​​And afterward receive me to glory.

​

25 ​​Whom have I in heaven but You?

​​And there is none upon earth that I desire besides You.

26 ​​My flesh and my heart fail;

​​But God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.

​

27 ​​For indeed, those who are far from You shall perish;

​​You have destroyed all those who desert You for harlotry.

28 ​​But it is good for me to draw near to God;

​​I have put my trust in the Lord GOD,

​​That I may declare all Your works.